Lep pozdravljeni!

Torej, da preidem k stvari. Za šolo moram napisat spis in bi rad, da mi nekdo, ki obvlada angleščino pogleda in popravi napake.
Na voljo smo imeli več tem in jaz sem si izbral A world of modern technology in mogli smo napisati kratek esej z 100-160 besed in predstaviti določeno temo in jo argumentirati in komentirati. Moj esej ima dovolj besed, vendar nisem siguren glede slovnične pravilnosti. Zato vas lepo prosim, če ga preberete in popravite napake in komentirate vsebino. Saj nam bodo ta esej ocenili in ne bi rad dobil slabe ocene.

Esej:

A world of modern technology

When we look back at the history of human being during the last 200 years, we will be surprised what amazing change modern technology has brought us. Trains and planes enable us to travel everywhere we want. Internet and mobile phones help communicate news to everyone. New technologies provide us a new standard of living, and I state that they are creating a single world culture.
Modern technology has shortened the distance between cultures, and made the world smaller. People can travel or migrate from one place to another very quickly. They see how people in other zones dress, speak and behave.
Another development of the impact of modern technology is on creating a similar world that makes it possible for cultures to communicate with each other. When watching TV programs, searching web and chatting through the Internet, people learn about foreign culture and try to adopt some of those as their own.
With the rapid development of modern technology, people learn and come to appreciate foreign cultures. They recognize the value of variety. Therefore, in the near future, there will be many similarities in different cultures.

Ocenjuje se tvoje delo. Če ti popravim napake in dobiš dobro oceno bom samo podpiral tvojo lenobo. Večino fraz lahko poguglaš in boš mogoče našel primernejše.

Ja vem, da se ocenjuje moje delo, vendar mora biti to dobro napisano in so zaželjene težje besede in bolj zakomplicirana slovnica in ravno zaradi težje slovnice nisem siguren, če je pravilno napisano.

se sicer strinjam z jimekom, ampak sem vseeno na hitro prebral tvoj tekst in ti svetujem da ga prebereš še enkrat. Mene izjemno moti, da se v 80ih besedah, nekatere besede pojavijo tudi pet in večkrat. To je že prva stvar. Poišči kakšne sopomenke, ali pa kako drugače obrni te stavke, da je besede ne bodo toliko ponavljale. Mene to ko nekaj berem preveč moti.

"the", "an" in podobne article spuščaš, ne samo tam kjer bi bilo slogovno zaželjeno, ampak tudi tam kjer so nujno potrebni, plus nekatere besede bi lahko zamenjal z ustreznejšimi, naprimer zones z regions, trough z over. Plural ti isto dela probleme.

Pojdi še enkrat čez "sestavek", boš sigurno našel svoje napake.

Hvala za pomoč. Sem našel še kar nekaj napak.